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First Movement

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Getting the words out of my mouth

these stifled words

and buckets of night

spilled against the windows

 

Tied to this bed

to calm my emotions

a bed of anxieties

filled with sleeping pills

 

We are automatons

in the chain of a destiny

already determined

 

I filled time with warmth

I wiped away the noises

I wanted to wash away the emptiness

 

A river of urine flowed under the table

human cattle in the arena of fools

 

Clinging to our illusions

our wandering hearts we sail

at the mercy of the winds stinking of pride

 

A bath of blood and lies

our dreams at the window

we wait for another life

 

Turn in circles like ducks

there's still an hour of sunlight left

then go back into your box

to wait they allow you

to breathe again

 

The gaze that chatters

you make your dinner

and you are good

as gold

 

Hands scratched by travel

wounded by fatigue

of days that are too long

these hands that seek tenderness

 

And the boredom of these surfaces that have nothing to say

 

The breeding ground of words that mark time

and cry out to us not to forget

 

The pot of roses will collapse

and the horizon will awaken

 

I have eaten my madness and my nightmares

and I kill time

so that it doesn't come back

 

All these layers of shit

and this nail polish

as long as a speech

These mouths that fall into ruins

and all this bullshit

that we are told all day long

 

I have seen men pass by in drag

to escape from mediocrity

made up to perfection

like rainbows

 

A red sky

killed by our gazes

perverted by lies

it's raining lost flowers

tired days

scars of memories

One should mate with beauty

and flee

flee again

 

I think my dreams

are turning the page

on something

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Second Movement

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Mid-afternoon and it's dark

A white van in the street

stops and slowly starts again

turns then comes back

stops again

and starts again

 

He was watching something

 

The dogs suffered and died

for three days

They had been poisoned

A slow and terrible agony

their killer was never found

 

Buried at the bottom of the garden

I think about it very often

 

Outside a man is pacing

eaten by rage

he drools his anger

he poisoned cats

a shit eater

he pissed on his bowl

so that others

couldn't enjoy it

 

A  waiting room

I'm alone for a long time

then it's me

 

Unimportant details

an exchange of glances

and then my mouth fills

with suffering

with loneliness

with lost memories

 

I was locked in a closet

writing lines of light

and hearing the sound of the rain

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Third Movement

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Her belly had changed

and the smell of her body too

she held time in her hands

 

Saying nothing, the days passed

she ate feathers

feathers on her plate

 

There was the smell of love somewhere

and the wind as an ally

to capture invisible dreams

 

The door was open

the delight of seeing

beauty mate

tears sowed their seeds

 

When angels give you pebbles

tell yourself that you will find your way again

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© Kotsuhiroi 2021